“Who looks outside, dreams.
Who looks inside, awakens.” Carl Jung.
If you’re reading this, you’re probably experiencing life in one of two ways.
It may seem like life is happening to you. You have a sense of powerlessness, that you’ve lost your spark.
Or you’ve got so much on it’s as if you can’t stop or it will all fall apart. You may be feeling anxious and overwhelmed which only makes it worse.
There are many reasons for this. There is your life, and its story: the one that has been holding you back all these years, which has in fact been telling you. When all the while you thought it was the other way round.
There is the bigger picture: the cultural and global issues that are causing so much fear and upheaval to so many. There is the foreboding, the grief masquerading as anger or hopelessness, around how it all will be. It all colludes with our sense that something is wrong. And if we are not careful it is easy to begin believing the story that everything is wrong.
I have two stories. The one that told me for most of my life: growing up as a young man in this culture, lost, and angry. Not knowing I was still a boy in a man’s body until I reached my mid-thirties and hit rock bottom.
And then there is the story I chose as my own: the travels and learning and living in traditional cultures, becoming a qualified Teacher, then Coach and Facilitator, and now supporting people of all ages in rites-of-passage and 1:1 transformation work.
The common theme of both is finding out what it means to be a human being. We take this question for granted, and yet how many of us truly know what it entails? I certainly had little to go on, as a boy growing up in a middle-class white town in the late 70’s and early 80’s. Then, in my twenties, something prompted me to pack a bag and go to India. What followed was almost five years of journeys to and from Asia. I immersed myself in every culture I visited, learning more than I could ever have imagined about what it truly means to be human. It was during this time that I studied meditation, yoga and internal martial arts, and Ayurveda. These have all now become an integral part of my Coaching practise.
It was many years later, however, that my unexpected initiation into adulthood came, when I undertook a three day rites-of-passage experience alongside 30 other men on the Scottish border. It was first time I had come face to face with my deepest, darkest fears and shadows, and it was that journey into the underworld, that enabled me to return something akin to a man who may yet have come good.
I now understand that health and wellbeing are vital for our fulfilment and happiness, but we will only find lasting peace when we stop fleeing from the things that we fear the most, and learn how to integrate them into our being.
Becoming a Coach and Mentor
I began my therapeutic journey as a Mentor with A Band of Brothers in 2014 (link below for details), going on to become Lead Coordinator for 2 years. This involved completing their in-house training, which includes the facilitation of highly effective and powerful therapeutic processes. I witnessed young men completely transform their lives with our help, and realised that this was something that everyone could benefit from.
Inspired by the experience, I became a qualified ILM (Level 5) Coach and Mentor in 2016. I then went on to achieve my NLP Practitioner qualification the following year.
I am currently studying with Stephen Jenkinson’s Orphan Wisdom School, and have been blessed in receiving mentoring from the excellent Kenny Mammarella D’Cruz.
All of this informs my practice, which has helped many men and women understand who they really are, and how to live a life that is meaningful and fulfilling to them.